Every now and again I get my panties in a wad over something my spouse has done (or not done). Then I check myself and remember how lucky I am to have such a great husband who is present in my life.
With Mother’s Day approaching, I have been thinking a lot about moms–all kinds of moms (especially single moms and military wives who are moms).
If I were a single mom or a military wife with an absent husband – my life as a mother would be very different indeed. I know this because two of my pals have husbands who are currently deployed. I have to give them props for all that they do without the help of their spouses.
I have been thinking about ways I could support them. I wasn’t sure what I could do, so I asked. Then it occurred to me that other people would benefit from knowing what they can do to help single and military moms in their lives. (Do ask – do tell).
So, here are ways you can support moms with absent spouses this Mother’s Day (or any day).
- Free babysitting. These moms don’t get many breaks. So, if you can, wrangle the kids for a bit to help the mom out. Be clear that there are no strings attached. You want the mom to enjoy the free time, not feel guilty about getting help from you.
- Schedule it. Instead of “Call me if you need any help,” consider “I’d like to bring you dinner/watch the kids one night next week, which day works best for you?”
- Yard work. My husband is mowing the yard as I write this. Who would mow the yard if he was deployed? I guess I could do it, although I would probably lose toes. How would I drive myself to the emergency room and hold my bleeding stump at the same time? Perhaps Molly (5) could push the peddles.
- Handyman tasks. Hanging stuff, moving furniture, etc. You know I never thought about this. I totally take this for granted. (And if you know me at all, you know I have more than my share of “projects” that I need help executing).
- Say thanks. A simple thanks is a great way to show support.
Thanks to our friend Chris Samulski, who is currently serving in Iraq. Rachel, you manage so much so well. You are a great mom!
And thanks also to our friend Tom Porter who is a Lt. Commander and Public Affairs Officer with the U.S. Navy serving in Afghanistan. This little girl – Alexandra – is a little older now and they have a set of toddler twins as well. It makes me tired just thinking about it. You are a great mom, too!
Happy Mother’s Day to all the moms who are doing it on their own. And we look forward to the safe return of these men — and all the men and women serving our country!