The other day, I didn’t have enough breakfast. Therefore, when my son (3) had a meltdown around lunchtime, I was ready for a meltdown of my own. I wasn’t the sweetest in that moment. And kids are so brutally honest. They’ll tell you when you are being mean. When this happens to me, I typically have one of three reactions:
1). I’m still melting down and I am happy to agree, “That’s right!”
2). Or, I’m calm enough to speak rationally and talk about what went wrong. (This is more what I wish I would do than what I actually do).
3). I wallow in guilt and self-reprimand. “Bad Mommy, you need to get it together. Pronto.” Then I feel sorry for my kids that they are stuck with me as a mom. (This was the case the other day).
We had lunch and then my little one napped. It must have been a magic nap, because my son out of the blue professed his love and told me I was the best Mommy in the whole wide world.
It felt good to hear that, because I was kicking myself for being shitty earlier and I was so relieved to know I got a second chance. I’m not sure how much longer this will last. I mean, eventually his memory will be stronger and I will have more consequences for my, uh, moments. But for now, I can bask in the knowledge that even though I lose it now and again, my son won’t remember my transgressions very long.So, I have a little more time to get it together. And who knows? As he gets older, maybe he will be less inclined to do things that make me lose it. (Well, one can hope).
So, how can I get it together? Drink a lot in the afternoons. Acknowledge the reality that Hungry Mommy becomes Mean Mommy. Solution! I could get up earlier to ensure I have a decent breakfast. But then I’m not really a morning person, so that’s probably not going to happen. So, perhaps I need to keep a couple of Twinkies granola bars in the car. That’s a little thing, but sometimes those little things pay big dividends.
So, here’s to second chances and the occasional breakfast of champions in the car!
PS – I haven’t actually had a Twinkie in years…but there is the dream of a Twinkie. I bet they wouldn’t taste good to me as an adult. I’ll have to leave that memory in tact and take the granola bar instead.
Have a great day!
I love this post! Well said, and I can certainly identify.
All parents have experienced those feeling so don’t beat yourself up. I had a stressful morning this week and lost my temper which Jp heard. I felt guilty and later, after I had cooled down, used the opportunity to speak to him about it. I think if you can use those moments to teach something to your kids at least some good can come from it. They need to know that no one is perfect and everyone has frustrations in life.